Deacons’ Wives Duties

tips for deacons wives
Planning a women's prayer breakfast

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Discover everything you need to know about planning a women’s prayer breakfast step-by-step in the book “Planning Amazing Women’s Prayer Breakfast”.

Have you searched for tips for deacon’s wives?

If you’re a current deacon’s wife, I’ll bet you have looked for cool resources for deacons’ wives.

If you are in charge of training deacon’s wives, I’ll bet you have also searched for cool advice and tips!

If you are a brand new deacon’s wife, I DEFINATELY KNOW YOU HAVE!

A sister in Christ (wonderful Kathy) introduced me to an awesome resource for any deacon’s wife ministry. Actually, and ministry wife would benefit from it. I’m a senior pastor’s wife, but I loved it.  Lots of parallels between my role and that of a decon’s wife for sure.

The book simply titled “Deacon’s Wives” By Diana Davis. It offers practical information, guidance, and advice on serving in ministry along-side your husband. It covers everything from tips for deacon’s wives to practical “brass tacks” wisdom any woman could use.

Some of the topics I liked included self-control to the “down and dirty”  elements of ministry such as avoiding gossip. Diana Davis even covers what to do when a new pastor is appointed to your church.×1024.png

Kudos to Diana Davis for creating this wonderful resource!

Here are some of my tips for women married to church deacons.

1. Support your deacon husband. He may have to devote copious amounts of time to church – no doubt about that. Hopefully, he will balance it all with family – but, not every deacon knows how to do that.

If he doesn’t, pray for him to receive wisdom for the Holy Spirit. Then, gently mention it to him from time to time.

Do it at the right time – not when he is tired or distracted. As you know, they can’t “hear” ya when they are stressed out.

2. Be available, as you’re able. If your lifestyle permits, go with Him on hospital visits and other tasks like giving communion to the home-bound. If your life is too crazy with kids and work, it’s ok. Let him leave without complaining about it and go when you can.

I personally do not accompany my husband on many ministry efforts. I personally don’t want to be associated with his “work” because then work is everywhere for him – both at the church and at the home too. That’s a matter of preference. You do what works for you.

3. Be an example. Sister, your husband is in leadership which means, to some degree, you are too.

Be careful of long chit chat sessions with other women. They can lead to gossip.

Keep your words praise-worthy. Stay in your own business.

Keep confidential information confidential. Take care of your children, your home, and your career with integrity and vigor. That’s for all of us whether we are deacons’ wives or not, right?

4. Be a super hero. Ok, well, not really, but I got your attention, rightt?

Basically, I just mean be a vehicle for change and support for the women in your congregation.

Help other women grow in godliness.

Teach and encourage them to be women of prayer and have healthy, robust prayer lives.

Model the ways of a peacemaker and a leader.  J

ump quickly to pray when you hear of problems and/or discord.

Again, be the peacemaker. Be the solution (with a little “s”) while pointing them to the Solution (with a capital “S”).

5. Be a tattle tell.  If you have a woman officially positioned as the overseer of the deacons’ wives, you’re blessed.

I’m sure your pastor used wisdom appointing her to that position. 

Be her ally. If something is happening among the deacons’ wives that unGodly, unfruitful, or could potentially cause discord – tell the head of the deaconesses about it.

If possible, ask another woman from the deacons’ wives to go with you when you talk to her.

So many situations can be diffused if wise leaders step in and squash it.  There is nothing wrong with sharing such details as a proactive way to thwart the enemy’s plan.

Did you notice so much of what I’ve mentioned is basically criteria of being a good Christian? Deacons wives are not usually part of the formal leadership structure but have a key role as a Kingdom woman – just as we all do (as ministry wives).

Do you have any tips for a deacon’s wife?

I’d love for you to post them in the comments section.

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GodsyGirl is a Christian lifestyle blog featuring Christian faith articles written by an ordinary Christian woman blogger, Christian inspirational podcaster, and a pastor’s wife. GodsyGirl is about Christian inspiration and living your fullest life as a fabulous Christian woman. Explore to find articles on everything from daily Christian living to hair, makeup, and living your absolute best life!