Are you the same person at home as you are in church? I had to ask myself that after I saw a really funny meme. Are you one of those “smiling, handshaking, hugged up next to your husband (when you really want to cut him), endlessly patient with the kids while at church (when you’d shank them at home for the same behavior)” type of Christian?
Do you walk an authentic Christian walk?
Do you wear a false face? Think about it. Is that you? Is it me?
I have to ask myself that question often. I am a senior pastor’s wife of a large congregation – I am also human.
Don’t Be a Phony Christian Woman—Sport Your Authentic Christian Walk!
I understand we can’t be totally the same person at church as we are at home.
Otherwise, we’d have a church full of burping (and maybe cursing) church people! Who needs that! Hehehe
Yes, social decorum has its place.
But something is wrong when you create a pattern of fakery that mentally exhausts you and confuses the heck out of your kids and family.
Peter “Tried It”; Paul Caught Him
Remember in the Bible when Paul “went off” on Peter for being phony?
Peter was chilling and eating with the Gentiles until the “church folk” came around, and then he dropped them like a bad habit! I think I posted about it before. It’s one of my favorite stories. Read Galatians 2:11-14 below:
11 Now when Peter had come to Antioch, I withstood him to his face, because he was to be blamed;
12 For before certain men came from James, he would eat with the Gentiles; but when they came, he withdrew and separated himself, fearing those who were of the circumcision.
13 And the rest of the Jews also played the hypocrite with him, so that even Barnabas was carried away with their hypocrisy.
14 But when I saw that they were not straightforward about the truth of the gospel, I said to Peter before them all, “If you, being a Jew, live in the manner of Gentiles and not as the Jews, why do you compel Gentiles to live as Jews?”
The Church Is a Hospital, Not a Social Club!
The church is meant to be a place for realness. It’s where we bring our struggles, pain, and honest emotions. It’s where we find help, advice, and support.
If you’re hurt, it’s okay to cry.
If you’re mad, bring it before the Lord in honesty.
There’s wholeness in the house of God—if He’s there. Sadly, some churches squeeze God out for the sake of their programs. If that’s your church, pray for the leadership to get a clue. God should have a place in the program. He should BE the program.
No need to fake it!
Sick people will be in the hospital, just like broken people will be in the church. Christian Women, Walk an Authentic Christian Walk!
Others need your authenticity too.
Walk an authentic Christian walk, and it may inspire others to do the same.
If you and your husband had a fight, why not pray together during the altar call?
It sends a message: God is your source, and in His house, you find peace—literally and figuratively.
If you’re stressed out, release it during worship. Don’t smile fake and pretend to be perfect all the time. No one believes you anyway. Walk an authentic Christian walk, all the time.
The Struggle Is Real—But So Is the Redemption
Every now and again, I emotionally crawl into service, then worship breathes new energy into my soul like a spiritual ventilator. Before worship, folks may ask, “Are you okay?” My reply is something like, “Honey, it’s been a brutal week/rough day, but I’m in the right place now.”
Why not?
Real is better.
Real is normal.
Fake Christians just contaminate the Christian pool anyway.
Look, the world already thinks we are hypocritical, so why perpetuate that? When your church family sees everyone else ALWAYS enjoying good, happy seasons, they think something is wrong with them when challenges arise in their own lives.
Besides, being phony is way more work than being authentic, don’t you think?
It’s mentally exhausting focusing on yourself so often.
When you can be 100% yourself, it comes naturally. When you have to self-edit, it requires more intention and more manufacturing—crafting mini-presentations of yourself at every turn.
For sure, it’s much easier to be authentically YOU and trust those around you to accept and love you in spite of it all.
No doubt, it can feel risky, but it’s worth it.
Embrace Your Weakness
The truth of the matter is, our weaknesses are what make God look best. They reinforce our reliance on Him.
It’s in our weakness that He is the most powerful in our lives. Authentic Christian living is about embracing that power.
Girl, I Saw Her at the Movies!
See, when I grew up, my family belonged to a very conservative and strict denomination. The women didn’t wear pants (or at least not around other Christians), and things like movies were completely out of the question!
However, when I started driving, I did my own thing. I also discovered many of the people I saw on Sunday mornings were doing the same rebellious things I was doing as a teenager.
Anyway, they weren’t really rebellious, because God never told us we couldn’t go to a movie! I think He just wants us to exercise wisdom in terms of what we see and watch.
Girl, I would see so many church members wearing pants (NOTHING WRONG WITH PANTS!) out in the world. They’d stand in the very same movie lines I was standing in as a teenager.
One particular time, I remember seeing a strict lady from the church in a movie line (OOOOoooh!). She wouldn’t make eye contact with me. LOL
I think she figured as long as she didn’t see me looking at her, she was invisible or something.
I’m not saying she wasn’t walking an authentic Christian walk, but she was so hard on us about movies. I don’t know.
Seriously, as a young person, it sent me a message about being sneaky. I felt that did more harm than if she would’ve just said: “Hey, I wanted to see this movie, and I don’t feel there’s anything wrong with it.”
Authenticity is Key
So much of what we do impacts others, and people are always watching. It sends messages, especially to young people.
Show your weakness, share your opinions, and keep your life congruent with what you say and teach.
Still, be wise in your authentic Christian walk.
I don’t think it’s wise to tell “your business” willy-nilly. That’s not what I’m saying. But be as authentic as you can.
Your kids will learn to be real as you model genuine living for them. They can look back and say, “Mama had bad days, but she handled it with prayer and worship.”
Same with other folks. They need to see how a real Christian does life and handles stressful situations.
No one is cheery all the time. Not sure why we feel we need to be.
Honestly, I think we’ll reach more folks when we embrace our “warts” as well as our “wins.” Yeah?
When my son got married, I was tempted to dance to a hymn or something. But, I listen to Christian rap in real life, so why pretend? My hubby and I dance around the house all the time. What’s wrong with that?
Honey, I let it go! I’m going to be the same me outside as I am inside. Embrace your authentic Christian walk!
Authentic Christian living isn’t about perfection, it’s about genuineness and reliance on God. Let’s embrace who we are, flaws and all, and walk this life with authenticity. Let’s model it for our families, our churches, and the world.
Remember, God doesn’t call us to be fake, He calls us to be real—authentic Christians, living by His grace.
Key Takeaways:
- Embrace your authentic Christian walk—flaws and all.
- Real living is better than fake perfection, and it impacts those around you.
- Be the example of authenticity that others, especially younger generations, need to see.
Additional resource I liked: Authenticity: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/authenticity
A-M-E-N!