Questions Christians don’t often answer


I’m gonna do something new and different here at

For almost two years now, you’ve read my thoughts, lessons, advice and tips.  Thank you for reading.

Anyhoo, it’s time you share your wisdom with us. Below, you’ll find 5 commonly asked questions Christian women ask. Take your time, inhale, and share your answer with GodsyGirl’s readers.

Note: Everything you’ve been through, survived and learned is for the glory of God. Use it for life fuel and teach another man, woman or child of His faithfulness and power in human lives. It’s your job to do this whether on or not. But I want you to start here!

My Request…

Lots of you email me directly with your thoughts and comments about my writings. I LOVE hearing from you; and your wisdom inspires me. I feel like I know many of you, though I’ve never met you in person. But now, I want others to experience your wisdom and encouragement too.

So, to answer one of the questions,  I’m going to ask you to post your response (as a comment) directly on for the entire world to see…well, not the world, but the few thousand folks that read the blog every month. *GodsyGuys welcome as well, just identify yourself as a club spectator.

Exception 1. if you’re shy, you may post anonymously. Orrrr, go ahead and send it to my email and I may post it (I’m such a softie). LOL

Exception 2.  if your initials are KR and you remember what I looked like at age five (you know who you are and you can do whatever you choose, Mama Row.) 🙂

Exception 3. my momma and I will just talk about the questions over the phone, so you’re off the hook too, Ma.

Okay, enough “housekeeping”.  Let’s get to it! Pick a question and post your answer! Be sure to include the question in your comment.

1. Why don’t the good Christian men marry?

2. Why do old people plan all the church events and expect young people to attend?

3. Why do I keep having sex (outside of marriage) when I know it’s wrong?

4. How can I find Christian friends?

5. When will do (how can) I feel complete and secure in my Christian walk?

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  1. 3. Why do I keep having sex (outside of marriage) when I know it’s wrong?
    Great question. To fulfill a void. Trust me, I know. I had my dad, grandfather, etc in my life so not that kind of void. A God void. You want a certain feeling from it. Like a mischievous high. You know it’s wrong but you can’t help the empty feeling and sleeping with people fills it (even if only for a short time). Then once you have slept with x amount of people, you almost become addicted to the “high” and even though during the act you are thinking, “what the hell am I doing,” it doesn’t matter. Until you realize the reason for the void, you are stuck. At least…I was.

  2. First I would have to say that I agree with mommytomason. I had the strong male role figures in my life but I had to get the “high”. But as time passed and I am learning more and more and ACCEPTING that I am God’s masterpiece (Eph 2:10,) I know that I am worth waiting for. Now on to the question I want to comment on 4. How can I find Christian Friends. When I first became saved I still had the friends of the world and the things that we were doing were no longer appealing to me. As time passed things began to interfere with our friendships and I knew that I had to let some people go. I remember asking God about needing to surround myself with Godly people. He opened up doors by guiding me to certain ministries to participate in and I began to notice how new friendships developed. Not only did He give me friends my age but some older women to help me and teach me about being a Godly woman. We can’t look for the same qualities that we sought for in past relationships or friendships. We must now look for friends that we know are children of God and are happy about it! What joy it is when you can worship and praise God together.

  3. Enjoyed and appreciated mommytomason and LaKisha’s comments! LaKisha-way to seek God and follow His will!
    5.When will I feel complete and secure in my Christian walk? As you grow closer to God..seeking Him daily..testing His voice verses that of EVERYONE else (including at times the church, your family, your close friends) will hear Him. Then you will have the confidence that only He can give you and the security that can only come from Him. Now as for complete in your Christian walk…I would have to say never..b/c God has great plans for you and as one is fulfilled another door will open.

  4. Sorry, I couldn’t just answer one..since I have experience here. 3. Why do I keep having sex (outside of marriage) when I know it’s wrong?
    First I had sex b/c I liked the “attention” and because I thought I knew what was better for me than God, my leaders, or my parents. Overtime that changed to having sex b/c I felt worthless and that I would never be granted a Godly relationship for all the sin I had commited. Having been married for three years now, I can finally see why God doesn’t want us to have sex, how wrong I was to use this gift, and how God can take someone from a disgusting place to a beautiful relationship. He never gives up on us, so don’t give up!

  5. Here’s one from a very insightful reader (via email):

    5. When will I feel complete and secure in my Christian walk?
    I wonder this sometimes.  There was a point in my christ walk that I would share Jesus with others without worrying about what they thought, but somewhere along the road I got concerned with “what others think” and start to back away from sharing the gospel.  I became a people pleaser and not a Jesus pleaser.  So now I have this “shyness” that I cannot shake and I don’t like it because I feel myself conforming and this is just wrong.  Since my husband died I have had opportunities to witness and I have found myself getting stronger.  So some things happen for a reason and only God know and will reveal if and when He gets ready.
    My answer is:  When you feel that pleasing God is more important than pleasing man, then I guess you will feel secure and complete in your Christian walk.

  6. 3. Why do I keep having sex (outside of marriage) when I know it’s wrong?

    For the moment it seems to cure the loneliness that has housed itself in the core of my bones- unmoving and earth shattering it pleases the outer skin of the pain hiding just beneath the surface. There is a fear of the unknown, or a lack of trust in doing things the right way. I know right from wrong-just as everyone else, but for some selfish reason I choose to please the body while my heart is pleading for my soul to have some relief. It’s sad at times… Imagine if life came with a road map, warning of pending danger if that route is taken instead of the this route. This is what sex without meaning does to the soul. It creates a path- a chosen path that for the moment seems exciting, when in reality it is mocking our or my decision to be submissive to the physical rather than the spiritual.

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